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May 21, 2013, 3:05pm

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Topic: THE TEACHER APPLICANT (Read 252 times)

Mr. Pinto Bean
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THE TEACHER APPLICANT
« Thread Started on May 15, 2009, 11:41pm »

THE TEACHER APPLICANT --- THIS IS A HOOT.

After being interviewed by the school administration, the teaching prospect said,

"Let me see if I've got this right:

You want me to: Go into that room with all those kids,

1. correct their disruptive behavior,
2. observe them for signs of abuse,
3. monitor their dress habits,
4. censor their T-shirt messages,
5. and instill in them a love for learning.

You want me to..

6 - check their backpacks for weapons,
7 - wage war on drugs and sexually transmitted diseases, and
8 - raise their sense of self esteem and personal pride.

You want me to.....

9 - teach them patriotism and good citizenship, sportsmanship and fair play, and
10 - how to register to vote,
11 - balance a checkbook, and
12 - apply for a job.

You want me to

13 - check their heads for lice,
14 - recognize signs of anti-social behavior, and
1 5 - make sure that they all pass the state exams.

You also want me to

16 - provide them with an equal education regardless of their handicaps, and
17 - communicate regularly with their parents in English and Spanish by letter, telephone, conferences, email, homework hotline, web page, midterm newsletters, and report card.

You want me to do all this with a piece of chalk, a blackboard, a
bulletin board, a few books, a big smile, and a starting salary that qualifies me for food stamps.

You want me to do all this and then you tell me....

"I CAN'T PRAY?"

Are you nuts!

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